SSDD, Agile Misunderstandings

So the latest job is moving to Agile.  They've got a nifty all-in-one Agile tool set up, with the usual problems such things involve.

But the real fun is that people are writing user stories who have no idea what the technical people on the team are doing, and without asking them at all.

This is driven by the mandate from On High that everyone will be doing Agile ASAP.

So we stumble along, as the uninformed are filling our backlog with items that cannot be broken down.

And the best - the tool training uses a team's per-iteration completion of story points as one of the metrics.  IOW, they expect every team to maintain a high rate of finishing business value. 

That won't have any effect on the estimation process, nosireebob.